Ever since I had my fist child, I put on some weight. The weight came on with the second child and the third child as well & yet never really went away. As I have started to get older I fear that it will never go away, let's face it-Weston is almost 17 years old, the time for change is ....well now dammit.
This will be my THIRD time trying WW out. The first time I did WW I think I did a pretty good job, lost about 30 pounds and then just-stopped. Went to IL for a visit-didn't have service on my phone & didn't track anything-and never really got back into it. I tried a few more times after that, but just couldn't find my groove.
But, the truth is-I am a fat girl. My family will all say, omg no you're beautiful. And I don't even know what to say to them when they say that. I just want to say, I never said I was ugly-I said I AM FAT! Look at it, look at the fat-it's there-hanging around like a bad meatloaf.
I get it, they think that if they agree then it may hurt my feelings-and hell it may, IDK....they have never tested that theory out. But I also get when you truly love someone-unconditionally, you don't see things about them that they see about themselves. Or you even rationalize it as, well I've seen fatter babe/mom.....IDK.
I look at my husband when he says he needs to loose weight or how much he hates his belly or hairline and I don't see what he sees. I just see a person I love and care about. So maybe that's it, but come on! COME ON! Don't fluff me off, say something like "well I think you should do what makes you happy and I am here to support you 100%"?
Anyway, long story short-I logged my food for the first time last night & I do plan on just eating/drinking normal for the rest of the week just to see what I've been doing to myself-though I did weigh out my dinner last night just to be on the safe side & eat things in portions! So I get 36 points a day & I used 48.....woops! LOL I hope I get better as I gear up for it to REALLY start this Sunday! Fingers Crossed :)
Very sweet.
ReplyDeleteThank you <3
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